Life is Destined or do you create it?

I believe that there are two ways of looking at life- live like its destiny or go ahead and do something about it. exactly which one is true or which one works is yet to be understood. Everyday I live both sides, well as per my convenience.Whichever gives me peace of mind. But this is one question that I have asked myself over and over again. Having witnessed power of both I cant deny either of the theories. Neither can I follow either one of the two.I dont know if most of the life that I have lived, the choises that I have made,the deeds that I have done are done because I was destined to do them? was I delibrately chartered towards certain circumstances that make me make the choices that I do? Or was it a conscious decision? Am I living my life the way I do because this is what I want? But a lot of things in my life that I dont want, all the pain and hurt, all the longing and suffering. I didnt make it. Neither did i choose it. Then what brings me where I am? over a period of time that I have been observing my life, sometimes stepping out of it, I only see a lot of things happening together, influencing each other like some bundles of yarn mingled,entangled with some knots, some cuts, some shreds...Did I actually create all this by the way I have lived or was it meant to be like this...written by the almighty? There is no reason or a season for things.This is not what I want, Neither did i plan it to be like this,then how did i reach here?